Roots

I spent the last weekend visiting my roots.
The people who knew me since I was born.
The friends who carried me though tough times at school.
The places I used to visit as a teenager.
The places where memories were made.

It was an amazing time. It was a privilege to catch up and to spend time with some of the people who shaped my childhood and teenage years.
It was an beautiful time. I was able to spend time with some of my mummy's best friends and find out what she was like at my age.
It was a challenging time. Seeing my friends living the life that I had planned on living: Married, children, nice house etc.
It was a time to reflect and to see how God's plan has unfolded in my life and to realise that although my life has not always gone the way I imagined or planned it to He surely has the perfect plan for me.

And in the words of Apostel Paul
"Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Phil 3:13-14

Forgetting what could have been, I'm striving towards the things that will be.

Snog, marry or avoid?

One of my friends and I recently started playing a game.
Snog, marry or avoid.
It's really quite simple: You say the name of 3 men and the other player have to say which one they would snog, which one they would marry and which one they would avoid.
To add a spin to it we would pick groups of 3 celebrities with the same name, for example Daniel Bedingfield, Daniel Radcliff or Daniel Craig.
We found that this game served as an amusing conversation filler.

As I thought about it though, I was convicted about how quickly I judge people and reminded of this bible verse.

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?
Matthew 7:1-3

Why is it that we are so quick to judge others? Whether it be due to their appearance or their history. Whether it be due to our appearance or our history. Are we scared of what they represent?

All I know is that I need God's grace and therefore I choose to exhibit grace to others.

By the way, I would marry Daniel Bedingfield.

Motto

Restoration

is my favourite word. It is my motto, my vision, my calling.

It is a word which conjures up a beautiful picture.

Restoration can be defined as:

the act of restoring; renewal, revival, or reestablishment.

a return to a former, original, normal, or unimpaired condition.

restitution of something taken away or lost.

a putting back into a former position, dignity, etc.

to bring back into existence.

to give back; make return or restitution of anything taken away or lost.

Reestablishment, restitution, unimpaired, dignity, bring back into existence, give back.

What have we lost?

The big picture is that everyone needs to be restored. Every human needs a reestablishment.

Where?

To their Father in heaven.

The unwise decisions in our life, the times when we choose our own way over the Father's, the things that distract us from his glory all cause separation.
We were created to be with Him. However, time and time again we choose to walk away.
We can be restored though His Son.
Restored to your former glory.

Restoration is a process.
It speaks of a craftsman taking his time, lovingly, gently sanding away the layers of ugly paint. Mending broken parts, recovering upholstery. Making the chair that was once fit for a king, fit for a king once again. Restored to its former glory.

Our former glory.

My dream is to be a part of this restoration process in many peoples lives. To bring them to the craftsman who so lovingly and radically restored my own life. He brought me from utter brokenness into wholeness. He brought me back into existence, back to the existence, to the life he had for me.

"You will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings" Isaiah 58:12

Amen

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xp_IIAf4-WE

Iron

Saul and his son Jonathan and the men with them were staying in Gibeah in Benjamin, while the Philistines camped at Mikmash. Raiding parties went out from the Philistine camp in three detachments. One turned toward Ophrah in the vicinity of Shual, another toward Beth Horon, and the third toward the borderland overlooking the Valley of Zeboyim facing the wilderness.

Not a blacksmith could be found in the whole land of Israel, because the Philistines had said, “Otherwise the Hebrews will make swords or spears!” So all Israel went down to the Philistines to have their plow points, mattocks, axes and sickles sharpened. The price was two-thirds of a shekel for sharpening plow points and mattocks, and a third of a shekel for sharpening forks and axes and for repointing goads.

So on the day of the battle not a soldier with Saul and Jonathan had a sword or spear in his hand; only Saul and his son Jonathan had them.

1 Samuel 13:16-22

My name is Sally and I am a comparer.

During my studies I loved comparing different literary texts: looking for similarities, differences, trying to find common messages and images within them. I enjoy comparing prices and picking up the best deal. But I also have tendancies to compare myself to others in an unhealthy manner. Looking at their skills, giftings, looks, family, whatever and wishing I could swap. Forgetting what God has given us as individuals, we all tend to be like this.

I read the passage from Samuel whilst away last week at a discipleship seminar and it brought a few thoughts to my mind.

Israel had no weapons. The Philistines had robbed them of the ability to create swords and spears. Sometimes situations and life robs us of certain things, maybe through not having certain experiences or opportunities. This didn't stop the Isrealites though. They used what they had, their farming equipment, and developed it into to something useful for another purpose. They didn't give up and shrink back from what was before them feeling ill equipped, but rather they got creative with what they had. What are the things that I assume are of no use? Can I creatively use them to built the kingdom of God?

God gives us what we need for the tasks and plans He has for us but often we need to sharpen our strengths, we need to develop our giftings and stop comparing ourselves with others.

One thing I nearly overlooked in this passage is where the Israelites got their weapons sharpened. "So all Israel went down to the Philistines to have their plow points, mattocks, axes and sickles sharpened." Now that is an interesting thought! The Israelites went down to their enemies to have their weapons made.
How often do we as the church, as christians, discount things for being worldly. Are we overlooking methods or practises which could be useful in advancing the kingdom?

It also makes me think of "iron sharpening iron" and the times when my non christian friends have challenged me in my thinking, maybe even more than my christian friends.

Praying that God would give me opportunities to sharpen my weapons.

Green fingers...

Awake, north wind, and come, south wind!
Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread everywhere.
Let my beloved come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.
Song of Songs 4v16

I love wind. Seriously, I do! I love the sound of the wind howling down the chimney at night during a gale. I love the wind ripping through my hair whilst walking down the street. I love flying kites on the top of hills and having the hold on tight.

This verse speaks of two different kinds of wind.

The north wind which makes me think of cold, uncomfortable moments where everything is a struggle. It reminds me of battling against the wind on a bicycle in Germany trying to stay on the cyclepath and not topple into the road. It reminds me of winter in Poland when the wind coming from Russia made the temperature drop to -30c. It reminds me of a coldness that brings death. The situations in life, although troubling and hard, which kill of my old ways and leave barren land behind.

The south wind makes me think of a pleasant, refreshing wind. That gentle breeze you feel whilst sitting on a pedalo on a lake in the Black Forest or the refreshing draught through an open window in a hot and sticky minibus on a windy road in Bosnia. This wind is a sign of spring, it brings new life and hope.

"Blow on my garden that its fragrance may spread abroad". These winds, these different situations and experiences will show the substance of our life.
- What is the fragrance of my life?
- What does my life show?

The sense of smell is a wonderful thing. Each day we smell thousands of different scents but still we can recognise what they are.
- What associations does my life have?

"The wisdom of the great Husbandman overrules diverse and opposite causes to produce the one desired result, and makes both affliction and consolation draw forth grateful odours of faith, love, patience, hope, resignation joy and other fair flowers of the garden". Charles Spurgeon.

I want my life to bring fruit for God's kingdom and I've seen through my life that God uses both the hard north wind like situations and also the pleasant south wind situations to do this.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" Romans 8v28

Praying that God would help me to be faithful in all circumstances and that through that my life would be fragrant and draw people to Him.

Excuses...

Why is it that I'm so bad at keep up this blog?

Is it that nothing interesting happens? No, over the last 1 1/2 years my life has been full of up and downs, mistakes and triumphs, different countries, different cultures, different languages.

Well, is it that I'm not good at putting my thoughts and feelings into words?
Is it that I'm scared of people having a glimpse into the Sally that is sometimes so well hidden?
Is it that I don't appreciate the people who support me and invest into my life?
Is it that deep within me I'm too independant for my own good?

Last week I spend a week in the Lake District with a group of Pais leaders. Our theme for the week was Talmidim (the Hebrew word for disciple). We spend time looking at what it meant to be a disciple and how to disciple others, an idea which is so contary to what society teaches us.
The week has left me with many questions, which I am still working though and I have the feeling it will be a long process.

What does it mean to invite people on my journey with me? Am I willing to drink of the same cup with people as Jesus demonstrated at the last supper? What does this really mean? What does it mean to have a joint destiny with people? Is it just about working towards the same goal or is it much deeper than this?

What does it mean to submit my own will to that of my Father just as Jesus did (Matt 26v36-46)? Why is it such a scary thing? Is it because my image of God is distorted?

Jesus called his followers to be his disciples, to be his talmidim. He called them to be more than just students of his ways and of his theology, he called them to become like him. He believed in them enough to entrust them with the responsibility of being his representatives, of showing the world around them who He is.

Deep in me I desire this kind of relationship, this closeness with my Saviour and also I desire to live out this life of discipleship with my fellow disciples, encouraging and challenging each other along the way.

May the resurrection of this blog be the beginning of this...